Today, I’m handing my column over to my dear friend and writing colleague, Tamara Fickas. Her moving story about her experience with unemployment is something you won’t want to miss. Be sure to visit her blog: www.rockymountainwriter.com
“`For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the LORD, `plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope’…” ~ Jeremiah 29:11.
“I’m sorry; due to budget cuts your job is being eliminated.” Spoken by my former boss.
Really, God? How can losing my job be a plan for welfare and hope?
“I will be with you; I will not fail you or forsake you…”
~ Joshua 1:6
As a single person, unemployment has always been one of my biggest fears. Employment is the source for the things in my life like a place to live, transportation, and food on the table. For most of my career, I have made the choices of when I take a new job and when I leave one.
I was in control of my life until early 2007. Suddenly, I was sitting across from my boss as he said the dreaded “L” word – LAYOFF.
In the weeks after my layoff, I settled into this new reality of my life as a person without a job
My mother had suffered from a degenerative neurologic condition called Lewy Body Dementia for about ten years. This form of dementia is not well known, but is not rare. It is the second leading form of dementia in the US. Lewy had worked its way into Mom’s life and stole her ability to do the basics for herself. Dad was her primary care giver, my sister and I helped when we could. The layoff meant I was able to be there for them more hours each day.
Our days were status quo for several months. I sent out resumes and networked. I cooked and cleaned at my parent’s house. I spent time with Mom to give Dad a break.
After a routine physical in late June, it was found that my dad had massive blockage in his coronary arteries and he needed immediate quintuple bypass surgery. This revelation rocked our world and would have been more devastating had it not been for my unemployment. Because I was still searching for work I was able to move into their home with Mom while Dad was in the hospital and through the months that followed as he recovered.
During those months, I saw my desire to nurture and care for a family realized. I would not have asked that it be fulfilled in this way, but God placed the desire in my heart for exactly this situation. I dreamed of being a stay-at-home-mom but God chose to make me a stay-at-home-daughter.
When Mom was bored or agitated or depressed, I would tell her stories, sing silly songs to her, and do things to make her laugh. I comforted her if she woke during the night after a bad dream. I planned meals and cooked for my family.
It was all the things I had dreamed of but God gave them to me in an unusual way. In fulfilling my dreams, He allowed me to live out one of His purposes for me – to be there for my parents during that tough time.
Towards the end of my time as an unemployed person, Mom fell and broke her neck. After nine days in hospice, she let go of her frail, earthly body on October 31, 2007, and is now dancing and laughing with Jesus in heaven. Because of my circumstances, I was able to spend the last ten months of her life with her almost every day. I was able to give to her as she gave to me. And I have special memories of this time with my parents that I cherish.
That year was one of the hardest years for my family. It was tough to watch Mom decline. It was heartbreaking to witness Dad slowly losing the woman he had loved for more than 50 years. Still, during that time I saw the loving way Dad cared for Mom. I saw them hold hands and giggle like school kids. I saw the way God meant for marriage to be and I had a perfect picture of what “for better, for worse” really means. It was an amazing time.
I often tell people that God blessed me by laying me off. As Cynthia said the other day, people think I’ve cooked my noodles too long when I say this. But God’s plan was to disencumber me so that I could support my parents. I was unemployed, but I was under God’s wing the whole time.
About Tamara Fickas
Tamara D. Fickas is a freelance writer living the dream in the beautiful Rocky Mountains. Her desire is to glorify God through the words that He has given her. You can find her at www.rockymountainwriter.com
Cynthia, thank you for this series of blogs and for inviting Tamara to be a part of them today. What a blessing! Talk about a divine perspective…
Thank you for your kind and encouraging words, Cathy! I’m so glad that Tammie was able to host today’s blog post. She has such an incredible story!
This is how we overcome. We share our stories of how God got us through it. Thank you Tammie, for sharing with us.
You are so right, Keiki. Sharing our joys and trials with others provides the encouragment to continue our life’s journey. Tammie’s story is a wonderful story of God using the desires of her heart just when Tammie thought her life had taken a turn for the worse.
Thank you Cynthia and Tamara! This reminds me of Laura Story’s song…Blessings.
Amazing how God always knows best! I’m in the process of losing my mom now. She’s been diagnosed with brain cancer…I pray God gives me special times.
Oh, Marcia, I am so deeply sorry to hear of your mother’s illness. When I write, I pray that every word counts. When I pray for you, I’ll pray that every day with your mother will count as a special day, a special memory in the making. My father died from cancer. It’s very difficult to lose a parent this way.